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| Pushpa's daughter |
So, I am working in this Government Hospital in Delhi which
leaves much to be desired. I have been working for the Delhi Government for close to two decades now and for over a
year and a half in this particular hospital.
I would like to just do patient work and not worry about
setting up the clinic and fighting to get mundane things done. But here I am ,
after 20 years, back to square one. Starting afresh in a new place .Things move
really slow-like really really slow in our set ups. There is too much paper
work involved and too many channels to go through before you can get anything done. I know I am looked down upon disdainfully
for fighting to work when I can jolly well get the pay cheque home without
doing anything at all. It’s sad but that’s how it is! My tolerance levels are lower now than when I
had started out 20 years back and plain and simple ,when you get used to
working in somewhat comfortable conditions and then have to revert to a place
where you have to handle teething problems, it’s not easy.
So I don’t like the room I sit in(it’s claustrophobic) ,there
aren’t enough facilities for the patients, I have to refer patients to other
places for small little things because I have no space, manpower and equipment.
I am only able to do 25 percent of what I can do for the patients. I feel very helpless
and frustrated and tell myself I should not give a damn and just find ways to
pass time from 9am-4pm to get that pay cheque. Then I talk myself out it and
tell myself I can’t give up. And so life goes on!!!
And, nothing keeps me more grounded than my rendezvous with
my poor patients. I give myself the luxury to listen to their stories and get
carried away sometimes. The lower middle class and poorer gentry of patients
that come to me live a life which is quite unlike the lives we live. Each one of them would probably have a story of human endurance and
most of them are so busy just trying to earn the three square meals a day and
have a roof over their heads ,that they would find it preposterous that someone
in my position should have anything to complain about at all!!!
But that’s how we are –never satisfied!!
I am sitting down this morning to count my blessings again ,not to complain. I am typing to stop myself from the
downward spiral of thoughts. I am remembering Pushpa’s daughter and smiling!
Yeah that’s Pushpa’s daughter!
I just opened the door to call out for my nursing orderly
yesterday and found one lone human being sitting in the patient waiting area.
This little human being,sitting there eating a banana. It was such a wondrous
sight. I was told she was Pushpa’s daughter( wuteva:)) and Pushpa was with the
doctor in the next room. Well pushpa’s daughter is already super independent,
taking care of her mom’s belongings, eating that banana and waiting for her mom
just like she was asked to.No fuss!! Just look at her hiding her face when I
tried taking these pictures.And then when her mom was back,you should have seen
the resplendent smile on her face. I backed off thereafter !!
I am so so grateful for my patients and for my connect with
them. All these people I don’t know ,all these people who make me feel more
human every single day!
I hope , one day , I can tell you
about my state of the art clinic in this hospital ..... when I get there!!! Amen!
