Bring it on!

You win some, you lose some. 

And then there comes a stage in life when you no longer care whether you win or lose. You just want to be happy with your lot....content with what you have, not aspiring for more .

You want to make people around you happy and not care about yourself anymore. You are just at peace with yourself and you don’t care if you are not good enough for the people you love. 

The moment you start thinking of what YOU want and don’t want for yourself, the whole game gets complicated and nasty. Because that’s one journey where you never reach the destination I guess!

You can be happy buying material things, amassing wealth, hoarding up for the future, going on holidays, binging , drinking and making merry. But it’s all so temporary. You just want to while your time and believe you are having a good time. That is the core of your existence-to think you are happy.To do things that bring you happiness for now.

 And its all fair and good enough-life is just that-keeping yourself busy,on a day to day basis,doing things you are expected to do,believing in things you were brought up to believe. You convince youself and find meaningful explanations for your actions-right or wrong(who decided that anyways!).That’s how we are made-human beings,the higher mortals,the smartest creatures on earth(or so we want to believe!)

But ,in your lonely times, sometimes you will reminisce about your past and smile,sometimes you will brood  over how you got a worse deal than others(you don’t know their story ,mind you! You just THINK you got the worst deal!).You feel sorry for yourself because you think you deserve better.You believe you are more awesome than others.

Reality is actually simple! We are all the same.Each one of us with the weaknesses we fiercely guard,so that the world can’t see us for what we are.Each one of us living a farce, fooling the world and ourselves into believing we are more deserving than others!

Tonight I just want to free my heart and mind of longings and hurts .I don’t care if I don’t wake up in the morning tomorrow.I don’t care if I live or die.I just want to sleep and fly in my dreams...into the sky,like a free bird,without a care! I don’t want to fly back to the safety of my nest.Frankly speaking,I don’t even want a nest.I just want to fly!!!Fly up and away,free of my affectations,free of my own expectations of myself-just FREE!I am growing wings  tonight and taking that flight of fancyJ

P.S- I dozed/flew off scribbling all that last night and then landed with a thud---literally!!!The lap top fell off my lap and brought me back to my reality. I’ll try flying again some other time:))

It's a new day again.I am ready to face it-bring it on!!!

I love you world!!!